A New Beginning II

Today I saw an old friend and was reminded to finish up my post from a while back!

Anyways! Gosh. so much has happened since I wrote my last post. So, I've officially moved into my new apartment for a month and half. It has been a wonderful haven for me. My roommates are amazing women of God. They are both from my church in New York. One is on the worship team and is an amazing prayer warrior and the other one is committing into full time youth ministry with the church and is also another awesome prayer warrior. We have had moments where we prayed, chatted, vegged and not see each other for a few days thingy. I love my living situation.

Job and vocational stuff. I came back and knew that this phase of life was going to be hard. It has been SOOO hard. don't get me wrong. I often times want to just break down and cry. About the uncertainty of tomorrow, the next week, the next months and stuff.. I often times really want to take control of my life...i often times am SOO impatient with not hearing back and this whole waiting waiting waiting phase. tick tock tick tock....

I started job hunting since mid September, but only went full core when I moved into my new apartment at the beginning of October. I only had my first interview starting from the end of October. I sent out probably around nearly 100 resumes and cover letters and only heard back from 5 organizations. out of the 5, 2 have already rejected me. another one i am pretty positive i will not take, that leaves 2, one which i already had my 2nd round interview and another one in which i have my phone interview tomorrow with. The one i already had my 2nd round interview is the one that I really truly want. I prayed to God in the end of September for what kind of job I wanted and I was specific....and this job pretty much contains everything I asked for. the 2nd interview went really well but at the very end when they said "we will notify you within 2 weeks- we still are interviewing others..." my heart completely SUNK. How long do i have to fight this battle of the unknown...i'd seriously rather take an exam then do these interviews...i like to see results...FAST. but this is not.

Anyways- so many people are praying along with me on this job. I started to wonder, what if this job is not for me? I haven't really got a chance to discuss with them the visa situation...what if we are all praying for the wrong door? I start to think about plan B- which is another job (that means i have to keep on sending resumes...but i really have come to a stopping point...things are starting to look tasteless and boring) or plan c- go back home to Taiwan. I don't want to go back home to Taiwan yet- but I have been thinking about it more and more everyday. Letting my expectations of job to go....but shouldn't I proclaim the promises of the Lord?

This whole job thing has really immobilzed me in many things. I was reminded again about staffing...i think i get reminded of it at least once each week. I keep on thinking that once I get the job, then I can go all the way with volunteer staff- but I have found it to be so fruitful in meeting up with students individually and listening to their stories and struggles and praying with them. Do i have to be an official staff member to serve and to do the Lord's work? I have no title right now- but I feel like i'm investing as much as i can- those individual 4 hour convos have been so amazing. That application is still sitting on my desk top...i guess i am ultimately NOT a multi-tasker. I can only focus on one thing- JOB search that I completely forgot about filling out and praying and discerning about student ministry.... aiya aiya!

who knows what tomorrow brings.
my year's verse is Hebrews 12:1-2
Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a huge crowd of witnesses to the life of faith, le us strip off every weight that slows us down, especially the sin that so easily hinders our progress. And let us run with endurance the race that God has set before us. We do this by keeping our eyes on Jesus, on whom our faith depends form start to finish.

who knows what will happen. but i am going to be faithful