Calling.

One violin artist at church one time in new york told me " some people have a burden for China, but you my dear, you have a calling."

What is that calling? I am almost 25 years old and i'm still confused about what i want in life. Here are some big goals
- I want to glorify God
- I want to be able to use my gifts that He has equipped me
- I want to be good at my job, but also enjoy the learning and hard times
- I want to honor my parents for giving me such great education and loan-free life.

what is it?
I am currently a social work student at a really good school and never ever have i felt this insecure before. I remember the whole first year grad school was multiple questioning about what i'm doing. is it right? is it really worth me putting so much money in? People always say "hahah- you are not in it for the money" its true...but what if i really do want to earn money to support myself, my sister, my parents? and one day be able to support a foundation that can go to remote areas....and really oversee and look and fund people?

Yes- I'm Isaiah 6- Dear Lord, send me. I'm defintiely a person that wants to go more then stay. BUT- maybe i'm wrong. maybe its because i have been sheltered for a long time and finally after being on my own for the first time in China- the passion i had was the first thing i wanted to pursue. However, i know that passion i have for China is not just a first time thingy- it stays. it aches. but what can i do to go back? I have been having so much fun doing ministry work in Taiwan- esp with the young high school teenagers. I look forward to the learning and experiences i shall have with InterVarsity for 07/09 as volunteer staff. I need more training in managing time while also be able to selectively spend quality time with girls. i enjoy one on one conversations more nowadays. There is more opportunity to be vulnerable and share.

So i have come up with some options for what i should be doing
- finish my second year in social work
- find a job that is NGO or profit or hospital (but i prefere the first 2 and NO nonprofits...i really don't get them)
- Go back to school? apply for scholarships because dad will not pay for this one. thought about international development, NGO administration, even thought about starting a whole new career- since i like creativity- thought about MBA in marketing/advertising, urban planning, architect, international human rights lawyer, development economist, professor and of course- EVEN....even the idea of going back to medical school.
- forget abo9ut all the above and just go to China....become a long term full time language student and immerse into the local culture. ...

What is it God? .....I pray for an answer!